It's been almost exactly a week since I said goodbye to Tom. I've finished up my finals, finished up my grading, and finished my literature review paper. My stepfather flew down and we drove all the way from Nashville, TN to East Longmeadow, MA. It took from friday night to saturday night, but it wasn't so bad of a drive. I got two phone calls from Tom while we were driving. He made it safely to Kyrgystan and had to wait a couple days till they left for Afghanistan. Both phone calls were extremely short. The connection wasn't great so it was hard to really have a conversation. I kept hearing my echo which was tripping me out.
Sunday I went Christmas caroling on Sunday with my father, aunt, and Lauren. It was more driving around to the places than actual singing but it was still a nice time. I didn't hear from Tom at all that day so I wrote him a really long email that night and hoped to hear from him soon. I knew he had to travel to Afghanistan so I wasn't sure how long exactly it would take him to get there.
Monday I finally heard from him. We both got on messenger and actually got to talk. I was so excited to finally talk to him. We both hooked up skype and were able to do video phone conversations with our webcams. It's so nice to beable to see his face and hear his voice. Trust me, it does not come anywhere near as close to being like he's there in the room with me, but it's definitely better than no conversation at all.
Unfortunately, his schedulue really blows. He's working some insane hours and they just don't really jive well with what my schedulue is going to be like next semester. I just predict a lot of problems with not getting a chance to talk to one another. And without communication... we're lost. We have to rely 100% on emails and webcam conversations, that's all we get. Its not like when you are living with someone and you both have a busy day and you keep missing each other, just not getting a chance to have a convo or a meal together. Because at the end of the day they still get to fall asleep next to that person and know that they are there beside them. With us, we miss each other and that's it, another 24 hours minimum until the next time you get a chance for any contact what so ever with the person. I mean, how do you keep a relationship alive like that? How can you share your day with a person, tell them how you feel, give them comfort, if you can't even say a quick hello to them?
I miss having something happen to me, even something insignificant, and being able to call him up right away and telling him about it. It's so amazingly frustrating to go from so much contact to hardly any at all. It's going to drive me mad, I can tell already. I just... I have a bad feeling about the whole thing. I don't like it. I don't like it one bit.I've survived one week at least. Only 49 left without him.
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